Monthly Archives: December 2014

Paperbacks

Hi guys! I thought I had already posted about this but I guess I haven’t, and I’ve been getting some questions about it:

Paperbacks.

Samhain used to put all full-length novels out in paperback one year after their e-release. They’re switching to a new model at the moment so things are moving around. To the best of my knowledge, my books will release in trade paperback as follows:

Sweet Disorder – Jan. 13th, 2015. It is already available for pre-order in Samhain’s store—and it’s currently 30% off ($11.20)!

True Pretenses – March 3, 2015.

In for a Penny – June 2015.

A Lily Among Thorns – September 2015.

And don’t forget, the Sweet Disorder e-book is currently on sale for 99¢ at all retailers!

New contest: TRUE PRETENSES e-books, and a gift basket!

ETA: This contest is closed. Mary D. is the winner of the basket. The e-book winers are S2, Anita H., Lozza, Nancy Gilliland, and Taffygrrl. Congratulations, everyone!

True Pretenses comes out in just a few weeks! To celebrate, I’m giving away 5 e-books and a lovely gift basket of items, and this time, the basket is included. Only it’s not a literal basket…

final

Yes, the True Pretenses gift basket operates in a long con artist–fiction tradition of briefcases full of cash!

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SWEET DISORDER short story!

To celebrate the imminent release of True Pretenses (about a philanthropist heiress who agrees to a marriage of convenience with a Jewish con artist to get her hands on her dowry), here is the traditional free short story about the characters of my last book, Sweet Disorder.

For bn100, who asked for “Nick is a vampire and Phoebe is a dragon.”


Poor child of Doubt and Death
 

“And there he saw, concealed from Heaven’s rays—
Long banished from Albion’s dreary shore,
Nor suited to her cold and bloodless ways,
Tho’ thrived among us once in lustier days—
Or should I say, in lustier nights—vampiri…”

Byron, Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage

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TRUE PRETENSES short story: taking suggestions!

So I have a tradition. Every time I release a book, I celebrate by posting a free short story based on a suggestion from a reader about the characters from my previous book. NB: All contain spoilers.

For In for a Penny, I wrote “Four Times Percy Garrett Didn’t Kiss [SPOILER REDACTED], and One Time He Did“.
For A Lily Among Thorns, I wrote “The way of a man with a maid“, about Deborah Hathaway’s first two weeks of marriage to Jonas…which do not go very smoothly.
For Sweet Disorder, I wrote “Poor child of Doubt and Death“, in which Nick is a vampire and Phoebe is a dragon and everything else is pretty much the same.

And now it’s time for me to take reader suggestions for a True Pretenses short story! This one will go up when the next Lively St. Lemeston book comes out. (Maybe next January with Listen to the Moon, but maybe sooner—I’m thinking about publishing a novella this summer…)

I’ll take suggestions of any kind, in any format, as detailed or vague as you like. What ifs, alternate universes, missing scenes, backstory, and future scenes are all fair game. Feel free to treat your comment like a mini-brainstorming session if you want!

You can see past suggestion posts here.

Legal stuff: by submitting a comment on this post, you permit Rose Lerner to develop your story idea without any expectation of financial compensation or remuneration. The resulting story will be available to readers free of charge.

Some suggestions to get the ball rolling:

1. Ash and Lydia are struck by lightning and swap bodies.
2. Ash and Rafe’s first Easter passing as Gentiles.
3. Lively St. Lemeston is a small but bustling space station and Ash is an intergalactic confidence trickster.
4. Jamie’s first Christmas vacation, home from Eton.
5. Mrs. Humphrey and Aunt Packham get locked in a cloakroom together at the Gooding Day Auction.

Comment section is SPOILER-FRIENDLY!

Teaser Tuesday #3

TruePretenses_220Time for another teaser excerpt from True Pretenses! Remember, you can read the complete first chapter and pre-order the book here.

(And an exciting annoucement: the first Lively St. Lemeston book, Sweet Disorder, is in the process of going on sale for 99¢ EVERYWHERE and it’s already kicked in at most retailers! Nook should drop in the next few days.

kindle * kobo * other buy links

And now back to your regularly scheduled programming.)

In this scene, Ash has just shaved and Lydia’s into it.

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A pair of living turtle doves on a little bed of roses

Okay, I have discovered something AMAZING. I was reading The Facts of Life: The Creation of Sexual Knowledge in Britain, 1650–1950 by Roy Porter and Lesley Hall, as you do, and I read what may be the greatest phrase of all time:

Graham was, perhaps, a wizard showman flourishing in the lubricious twilight world of sex aids

I’m going to let you read that again

Graham was, perhaps, a wizard showman flourishing in the lubricious twilight world of sex aids

YES. A WIZARD SHOWMAN FLOURISHING IN THE LUBRICIOUS TWILIGHT WORLD OF SEX AIDS. Here is what his business cards might look like:

Dr. James Graham, wizard showman flourishing in the lubricious twilight world of sex aids

In fact, I think I’m just going to start carrying those and passing them out at conferences.

Dr. James Graham was a sexologist (quack?) whose greatest claim to fame was his Celestial Bed, built in 1780, which he described as “12 ft. long by 9ft. wide, supported by forty pillars of brilliant glass of the most exquisitive workmanship, in richly variated colours. The super-celestial dome of the bed, which contains the odoriferous, balmy and ethereal spices, odours and essences, which is the grand reservoir of those reviving invigorating influences which are exhaled by the breath of the music and by the exhilarating force of electrical fire, is covered on the other side with brilliant panes of looking-glass.

On the utmost summit of the dome are placed two exquisite figures of Cupid and Psyche, with a figure of Hymen behind, with his torch flaming with electrical fire in one hand and with the other, supporting a celestial crown, sparkling over a pair of living turtle doves, on a little bed of roses.

The other elegant group of figures which sport on the top of the dome, having each of them musical instruments in their hands, which by the most expensive mechanism, breathe forth sound corresponding to their instruments, flutes, guitars, violins, clarinets, trumpets, horns, oboes, kettle drums, etc.

At the head of the bed appears sparkling with electrical fire a great first commandment: ‘BE FRUITFUL, MULTIPLY AND REPLENISH THE EARTH’. Under that is an elegant sweet-toned organ in front of which is a fine landscape of moving figures, priest and bride’s procession entering the Temple of Hymen.

The chief principle of my Celestial Bed is produced by artificial lodestones. About 15 cwt. [hundredweight] of compound magnets are continually pouring forth in an everflowing circle…

Any gentleman and his lady desirous of progeny, and wishing to spend an evening in the Celestial apartment, which coition may, on compliment of a £50 bank note, be permitted to partake of the heavenly joys it affords by causing immediate conception, accompanied by the soft music. Superior ecstasy which the parties enjoy in the Celestial Bed is really astonishing and never before thought of in this world: the barren must certainly become fruitful when they are powerfully agitated in the delights of love.”